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Well today was a big day for our family. Change is coming, and there is nothing we can do to slow it down, much less try and stop it. I’ve known this day was coming for years I suppose, but it hadn’t become clear until today just how much of an impact it would make. 

We took our son to the airport and put him on a plane for Mexico. We are so pleased with the life choices he’s made. There really is no place I’d rather him be when I consider everything, but it is hard to see him go.  I never understood how difficult it would be to let the kids go. 

There are so many lessons I should have taught, time I wish I had spent. Nothing like saying goodbye for a couple of years to remind me that I didn’t complete the project he wanted to work on this summer. My weaknesses are thrown in my face as I consider the missed opportunities. 

Hope?

I find only minimal comfort in reflecting on the things we did our best to get right. We have grown together over the years. I hope he knows how much his mom and I love him. I’ve never been great at communicating verbally. We did try to live in a way that would show him how important he is to us.

I think, if I can focus on the growth that this change will provide him I can make it through. The other thing I have to keep in mind is that while things are different, they are not over. There is still time to do better, to make changes, to improve. I can do it. I have to keep getting better, pushing myself and others to be our best. We all need to grow  over the next couple of years.